Sunday Secret

"When I think of you I forget my name and know yours all the better."

( top: do you remember when we were kids//and built the greatest castles on the beach//how the sun set and the tide slowly rolled in//and the waves slowly took everything from us without mercy//how we tried to save what could not be saved//fought with such fervor so peculiar//cursing and screaming and without a chance//didn't wonder for a second what was up with us//and when it was over, we only laughed//and drenched in sweat we asked ourselves what did we do//we could not have won, could only lose//the philosophers in us started to philosophize//why you do something even if it is hopeless//when you should rather stop if you are reasonable//we sat and talked and the sun went down//and we reached this conclusion that I found so formidable even then//what should we have done?//what should we have done?//maybe it's sometimes wrong to stay cool//but maybe it's wrong to decide for that//while we didn't give up together, we were so proud//no stupdid "so what!" and no simple "what for!"I would give at least one leg to dance with you one more time. and the rest, if I could only have you back in my life.

bottom: stop hating yourself.

please get well again.

we miss you.

The number of boys and girls with eating disorders is increasing )

love, jessieh

In reply: (and PS)

I have recieved several e-mails wondering "where the blogging has gone to?". I promise to write very very soon. At the moment though my living-load is significantly overwhelming and trying, even attempting to sort things into some kind of order with words at this moment seems very difficult. I promise to write later today, at least to give an update of sorts.

love, jessieh

secret in another language.

.it's funny almost, how we all speak the same language anyway.

Sunday Post: 23 (?) in 2

I will write more soon.

love, jessieh

PostSecret Madness

-This Blog Contains Stolen Subject Matter And Material-

from: http://setcycletospin.blogspot.com/

I'm out of town.

So I stopped blogging.

And I guess the only thing that makes me want to blog is other people's idiocy. I think that's what I'll rename this blog. Other People's Idiocy.I'm sure you've heard of PostSecret. It's a great art project that has touched many people's lives. People write their secrets on postcards and send them to Frank Warren, who runs the site on his own time for no money. He picks twenty or so cards each week, probably from hundreds or thousands, and puts them up as images. PostSecret is usually ranked in the Top 20 blogs read nationally on Technorati .

It's worth mentioning that Frank's mailing address is his actual house and it is displayed clearly on the site.Frank posts every Sunday. There were no new cards this week, not Sunday morning, Sunday night, or today. In addition, the comments section, which he usually screens and picks out maybe four or five to post, had gone insane, with over 3,500 comments there last time I looked. Alot of them were people posting their own secrets, supporting eachothers secrets, a few of them were people attacking eachother's secrets, some of them were wondering what had happened to Frank. Additionally, the suicide prevention number that had always been on the site was gone. No explanations. The monkeys had totally taken over the lab.

After reading 40 or so comments that asked where Frank was or begging someone to drive to his house to check on him, I did the following.

It was incredibly difficult and it took days and days of my time.

1) I Googled Germantown + Marlyand + police

2) I called the police department and said "I know this may sound strange, but. . " and then told them what I just told you.

3) The police said they would drive out to check on him and had me repeat what I had said to a dispatcher

4) I called back when they told me to and I was told Frank went on vacation.

I won't get in to the madness that is PostSecret right now, with so many posts that i can't download the site anymore. A lot of the people there seem to be supporting and helping eachother with their secrets, which is great.What I will say is this -- clearly I don't blog enough for anyone to get worried when I don't, but what happened with Frank was like someone not showing up to work for 8 days.

So to my family and friends:If I ever disappear for more than a usual amount of time and you have no way of reaching me, CALL THE FREAKING POLICE.And I promise that if you ever disappear, I won't sit at my computer and wring my hands and try to figure out what message you're trying to send me with your absence. I will also call the freaking police. Bloggers, let your audiences know if you are leaving town and don't plan to to communicate.

love, jessieh

PS: Thus far, on my trip, I've made eleven PostSecrets. If Frank doesn't post any of them, I promise to post them here. Well, maybe.