12.17.2007

Nerving the stomach.


Today marks the beginning of exam day. I have a French exam that I have not prepared for in appoximately one hour. I am not going to prepare for it. I spent nine hours yesterday in English-exam limbo. I took the English exam this morning and did well. I am a nervous wreck. For gentle and not so gentle reasons.
The gentle reasons:
I have exams all week. French is going to be disgustingly terrible. I looked at the study guide and my brain said, "Qu'est-ce what?" I gave up.
Tonight Studio III performs our scene showcase. I am so scared. I am terrified. And excited. Terribly excited about this. I know that we will feel so good as soon as it is over. As bad as it may go, I mean, worst possible outcome, it will still be much better than it would have been three months ago and this shows growth.
The not-so-gentle reasons
It is less than ten days until Christmas.
I leave for Columbia on Thursday. I am nervous about going home.
I feel disconnected, completely disconnected from the world around me right now.
The Good:
Jesus loves everyone.
Mere and the twins and a very special lady are coming to see the showcase tonight. It will be nice to see them all.
I was able to reconnect with someone who I have been trying to communicate with for nearly six years. The reconnection was a God-ordained one.
The Bad:
I am not hungry ever.
I am not studying for the French Exam. It scares me to much.
love, jessieh

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